The PSER game: Petrol Station Efficiency Rating

Have you ever sat at a petrol station, growing increasingly frustrated at the person in front of you taking their sweet ass time? You know, the person who took forever to get out of their car, then forgot to open the flap, and after finally filling up had to go back to their car to get their wallet. After they’ve paid and returned to their car they sit in there for what feels like an eternity, before finally driving away. In the meantime all the other queues have moved about 5 times?

I hate that.

So one day I invented a game to keep myself occupied. A game that I could passive aggressively hate on the person in front. It’s called the PSER game (prounounced pisser), or the Petrol Station Efficiency Rating.

The PSER game is a way of scoring the person in the car in front of you based on how fast or slow they complete their transaction at the petrol station.

The points for each action range in scale based on how amazing or how painful it was. For example, that person that goes back inside their car to get their wallet (Kat, I’m looking at you) will get deducted 2 points for something easily avoidable. There are special situations of course, for example mothers or people with injuries/disabilities.

Years ago I told my friends about it, and they’ve been playing the game ever since. We tell each other stories, and new scenarios where points hadn’t previously been accounted for. The list grew.

So now it’s your turn.

I’ve finally written the blog post about it. I want you all to join in the game and play with us. Tell us about those annoying or amazing people. Let’s see who can get the highest score, and the worst, and who can top their own personal best? Are you honest about your own score?

If you have extra scenarios that deserve a points bonus or deduction let me know, and I’ll keep the list updated accordingly.

Points Deducted

-1 point

• Taking too long to get out of the car
• Not remembering to open up the fuel cap cover and having to go back to reopen it
• Leaving wallet in the car
• Buying items from inside (sometimes necessary, but annoying all the same)
• Talking on their phones
• Washing the windscreen while people wait (seriously, move the car out of the lane so people can fill up, then come and collect the squeegee to use)
• Filling up an additional item e.g. jerry can

-2 points

• Having a passenger go in to pay but the passenger doesn’t walk in until the car has been filled (why are they not walking in while the person is filling the car, they’re not doing anything else)
• After filling the car, going back to the car and stuffing around doing something before going in to pay

-3 points

• Not even getting petrol, but using up one of the lanes (this is the worst)
• Sitting in the car for an excessive amount of time after filling up (way worse than in the beginning, because you know they could move and now they’re being assholes by not moving)

Points awarded

+1 point

• Simultaneously driving out of the lane while doing up seatbelt (multi-tasking for the win!)
• Having a wallet/payment method ready at the bowser when filling up so they go straight inside when finished
• Not buying any snacks (or collecting them while waiting in line)
• Hanging up the nozzle correctly first go

+2 points

• Using the new BPMe app that allows you to pay via the app, so you don’t have to go in to pay (as a mother terrified of going to the petrol station and having to take a child out of the car just to pay, this app is a lifesaver – BP need to sponsor me the amount that I’ve raved about this app to people)
• Having a passenger go in to pay while you’re filling up
• Driving out and picking up said passenger as soon as they walk outside the door, leaving the lane way free for the next car

Special situations

No points awarded or deducted in these situations:

• Mother having to collect child from car before going in to pay
• Disabled/injured meaning slower to move
• Using hand controls for the car and having to wait before hand controls become available to drive away, means a pause before driving away that could be misinterpreted as excessive time in the car

So next time you’re at the petrol station play along! See what score the person in front of you gets, and if you can top it! Post your scores below! Or share some extra scenarios!

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