Dinner, TV, bed: my Friday night

It's been a big week for me. I spent every night of this week out and about at night after work, from collecting the last of my things from C's place to hanging out with mates. Needless to say tonight I'm super keen to just sit on the couch, watch TV and indulge in a bit of reading.

I've cooked my dinner already, whipping up a bit of spaghetti. I'm still adjusting to cooking for one, but the bonus is how much leftover food I have. Hello frozen meals!!

Tomorrow I'm visiting the hairdresser (we had to move my appointment forward by a number of weeks due to my schedule being booked up for the next few weeks) and also a big movie marathon at a friend's house. I can't wait! It's also one of my 52 in 52 items too, speaking of which it needs updating to remove the ones C and I were meant to do together. [...]  read more

Heyyyy…I’m 29 and had an awesome weekend

So today begins the last year of my 20's, as I have now hit the ripe old age of 29. Just in time to get my life sorted for the 30's; there's no better time than now!

Courtesy of my amazing friends and family, I had an absolute cracker of a weekend. It began Friday night when a friend and I headed down to the local stadium to watch the QLD Reds take on the chiefs, which they unfortunately lost. However it did mean that I met my new favourite player, only for the extremely shallow reason that he is gorgeous. Other than that I don't really follow Rugby Union. [...]  read more

So very lost

I'm finding it really tough to read about other couples. I know that what C and I had wasn't healthy, but I loved him so deeply. I had thought about the future and planned it with him.

I saw it and I wanted it.

I think that's why now it's so tough. I feel a lot of self loathing. I wonder how I could have changed it, why it wasn't successful. Logically, I know it wasn't all me but that doesn't stop me from feeling the failure. When I first split with him my friend said to me “you haven't failed”, and I wondered what she meant back then. I hadn't felt like a failure. Now I get it, now I feel that sense of failure. [...]  read more

When will the pain to go away?

I'm so weak right now.

If he called I would go running.

I hate myself for it.

It hurts so much, the pain is incredible. Everything reminds me of him. I feel like I have no stories that aren't about him, or involve him in some way.

I just want to feel his arms around me, the warm protective embrace he had. Even if we had argued I always felt so safe there. My safe place, my haven.

Every day I walk out of the office I see work vehicles that remind me of him. I go to a football game, it's his team. I try to have fun but my mind returns to him. I scan the crowd, hoping to glimpse a sight of him, not knowing if he is actually there or not.  [...]  read more

Just another stupid love song

This song sums up how I have been feeling in the last day or so. To update you, C and I had an argument which ended the relationship for good. I will probably spend time writing my feelings down in the next few days while I let it sink in, but for now this song is capturing my mood pretty damn well.


Its one thing to ask why we break up. Have you ever wondered why it is we fall in love? Can you tell me? Do you know what it is you're looking for? What do we need? Can you tell me why I care? How is it that we hear that voice that says i want you there? [...]  read more