Wedding: the first month of planning!

Yandina station table setting

It’s been just over a month now since Mario and I got engaged, and things are moving quickly! The planning process: I signed up for easyweddings.com.au which has been really useful in helping us to put together a budget. We wrote a first draft for an invitation list to give us an idea of numbers, which … Read more

The story of how Kelsbells got engaged

Before I explain about how my amazing fella proposed to me, there’s a few things you need to know about us: He is incredibly romantic. I am not. He is classy and stylish. I am not. He’s quite cluey. I am very clearly not. The best thing about this story is that it’s not traditionally … Read more

An update of recent events in my life

Next month I'm riding in a 100km bike ride in Melbourne, and this week my lycra jersey arrived! It's the first time I've ever owned a lycra top (I bought my first lycra pants last month when I bought my bike), and I have to say it doesn't feel as bad on as I had … Read more

When do I become ready?

My life recently has been filled with lots of great moments: fun with friends, fun with family, my dog, the ones that matter. I've also got some great moments coming up: I leave for Bali in just under 2 weeks, I booked flights to Malaysia with my sister next year, and also to NZ for … Read more

It’s now all black and white, exactly how I needed

There's one thing about my mother that has always bugged me when I watch her deal with people that have mistreated her, and completely taken advantage of her. She always believes they will change. She always believes it will come good. She always believes that she and that person will get along in the future. Normally that would be a good trait, but not when dealing with someone that should be forgotten about.

Throughout my breakup with C, I have seen a similar trait in myself, and I hate it.

To clarify, I'm not saying C has mistreated me or that I was exploited. I mean that I see in myself this ongoing optimism that we will be reunited at some point. Before we split for good, I believed that things would change. We have been separated for two months now and yet I still had this belief that at some point it would all come good again, despite the fact that I never publicly admitted it and certainly tried my best to not believe it.

It all finally came to head when I realised I was thinking about him 24/7, which is not how someone who has been separated for two months now should be reacting. I should be through all of this, I should be in the rebuild phase (which I had foolishly believed I was).

Over the past 24 hours I decided I needed to completely change everything. C and I had been friends on FB, we had casually chatted via text etc about how everything was going. We had acted like we were totally fine with the break up and that we were friends. I realised I needed to cut that out. Immediately. I needed to completely detach myself from him, and any memory of him. I felt I needed to completely forget his existence for a while.

So I de-friended him.

Read more