Solo parenting for the weekend

I’m very lucky to have a husband that’s quite hands on with our child, and I try not to take that for granted. On one hand it means that I’ve probably had quite the easy ride compared to some mothers. On the other it has some drawbacks in a “too many chefs in the kitchen” kind of way, but for the most part I do really appreciate him being there as much as he is.

Not to mention that he’s entitled to be, because…you know….father of the child and all.

On a separate note, recently it’s become apparent that to me that my husband needed some time away. There’s been a fair bit weighing on his mind, and there’s one thing that always resets the soul – camping. His dad had also been asking when they were next going to go camping together, so it was perfect. He’s always been too worried about going away though, feeling guilty about leaving Luca and I on our own. [...]  read more

The night time party battle

Every night after the baby goes to sleep a battle rages within myself. I become giddy. I have two hands free and the time is my own. There’s so much I can do, and yet I don’t know where to start.

So many choices, so little time. Most times, due to sheer indecision, I end up watching tv, drinking a warm drink and then going to bed. Such a waste.

The night time routine

The thing is, I love my child, right? And I have no regrets. Before he was born, I had a busy night time. I had my 52 list to tick away at, I could read a book, do crafts, go to the gym. Any number of things. I would come home and get stuck in. It was rare for my hubby and I to have “quiet nights”. [...]  read more

Dealing with mum guilt and feelings of selfishness/weakness

I’ve been having a rough trot lately, although to look at my Facebook you wouldn’t think so. From an outsider’s perspective it looks as though I’ve been living the dream.

  • Going to three Commonwealth Games events
  • One of those nights staying at the Gold Coast (aka baby-free night)
  • Dad picking up the solo duties

But as is usually the case, Facebook is not as it seems.

This post may feel like I’m trying to justify my nights away, but it’s not. I wrote this because I want to get my emotions out of my head, share how I’m feeling, process it and move on.

In a nut shell, I’ve been feeling like people will be judging me and considering me to be selfish and a poor mother. [...]  read more

Guilt and failing at keeping everyone happy

When Mario and I planned our wedding I learned it’s not possible to keep everyone happy. In the 6 weeks since L has been born I’m learning the same lesson again.

Tonight I find myself sitting with a serious case of guilts and unease.

To my friends, my family and my husband:

I’m sorry.

I’m trying to respect your wishes, and your desires. I’m going to do the same for others. And in the course of that I’m going to piss some of you off.

Please know that none of it is intentional. [...]  read more

Cluster feeding…oh what a night

Overnight I learned what cluster feeding is. I learned that lesson at midnight, again at 1am, then 2am and so on. Right now it’s 6.30am and I’m still googling to make sure that’s what it is.

We are exhausted.

Mario and I are still working on a routine that allows both of us to get adequate sleep. Right now our strategy is “be more stubborn than the other one”, where we try to make each other go to bed. Needless to say it’s not very successful.

We did have a plan that I would feed and he would settle, but given neither of us sleep on schedule it’s not working. We eventually succumb to sleep out of pure exhaustion instead. Then the other person creeps around with bub trying not to wake the other up. [...]  read more