Monster weekend – pizza nights and zoo visits (video)

We’ve had a huge weekend, and there’s some very weary heads around the house.

From the moment I woke up on Saturday it was GO GO GO. We had a pizza night planned for Saturday night, so my job during the day was to occupy my son to keep him out of my husband’s hair while he prepared all the pizzas. My son and I went to his Saturday morning sports playgroup, then to the aquarium afterwards. By the time we got home at 11.30 he was out HARD. He ended up sleeping for 4 hours – that never happens. I had to wake him up at 3.30 so that he would have time to have (a very late) lunch before everyone started arriving for the pizza night. [...]  read more

February update for the 2018 52-in-52 list

Lush bath bomb dragon's egg

Another productive month this month with some more items to tick off the list! Right now as it stands I’ve completed 15 items, with 37 left to go.

Have a bath

Obviously this wasn’t a challenge for my hygiene; I have a shower every day. Ok, I’ll be totally honest; on rare days I don’t shower, but that’s because I have a young baby and it can be a challenge! But I do shower at least every second day, never longer.

No, this 52 was about taking some time out of the everyday and relaxing in the bath. Time for me.

Earlier in the month we visited the Gold Coast for our first family trip. During the long weekend we went shopping, and I spoiled myself with some bath bombs from Lush. I only got a chance to use one of them, but it was heaven.

The one I used was called Dragon’s egg, which is described as:

Dragon’s Egg makes bathtime exciting as it fizzes and crackles and changes the colour of your water to a gorgeous citrusy gold. Its scent is reminiscent of lemon sherbet, with a hint of jasmine, leaving you feeling great and ready for a good day. Its citrus scents leave you feeling transformed and invigorated.

All I know is that it felt awesome to relax. I even dozed off for a bit as well. The plus side is that I now have another couple still here at home to be used; now to just find some more time for myself!

Have a cocktail/mocktail

I treated myself for my birthday, and organised a dinner out with friends to my favourite Tapas spot, The Piano Bar. They make amazing espresso martinis here, so I decided that’s what I would treat myself with. The reason for it being a treat?

  • I barely drink anymore since I’m breastfeeding, and in order to drink I have to pump and save breast milk
  • I’ve gone off caffeine since we’ve found that Luca seemed to be sensitive to it

This meant it was a double whammy. However, what I neglected to think was:

  • Since it had been over a month since my “last” taste of caffeine (I’m not counting the bits in chocolate) I didn’t take into account how wired I would be. I couldn’t get to sleep until midnight, super super late for me nowadays.
  • The breast milk that we had stored for Luca was back from when I was still drinking caffeine – whoops. So even if I’d used it he would have gotten a shot of caffeine. The fresh stuff we had been using to allow myself time to visit the gym so we didn’t have any on hand.
  • I waited until the alcohol was out of my system before I fed Luca for his overnight feeds, but of course the caffeine hit meant that he became restless for the rest of the night
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    Guilt and failing at keeping everyone happy

    When Mario and I planned our wedding I learned it’s not possible to keep everyone happy. In the 6 weeks since L has been born I’m learning the same lesson again.

    Tonight I find myself sitting with a serious case of guilts and unease.

    To my friends, my family and my husband:

    I’m sorry.

    I’m trying to respect your wishes, and your desires. I’m going to do the same for others. And in the course of that I’m going to piss some of you off.

    Please know that none of it is intentional.

    Visits at the hospital

    We kept visits to the hospital to immediate family so we wouldn’t get overwhelmed. In doing so I forgot about some of my closest friends who are like family to me. I cried when I realised my oversight. It broke their hearts, and then it broke mine.

    Strike 1.

    Who’s holding bubba

    We had decided early on that we would hold off his meeting a lot of people until he had had his shots. If people had had all their vaccinations, particularly the whooping cough vax, that it would be OK. Our immediate family all went and got their shots so they would be able to cuddle him.

    This obviously offended some people because it meant they couldn’t come and see him. Consider it strike 2.

    Then we let people come to see him but if they hadn’t had their vaccinations they couldn’t hold him. Strike 3.

    Then I forgot to ask people altogether and just assumed they hadn’t had vaccinations, so said couldn’t hold him. Strike 4.

    Thank god he gets his vaccinations tomorrow.

    Trying to get a sleep pattern happening

    Right now, L doesn’t sleep well during the day. I’ve read countless articles online, a book recommended by friends, and consulted some iPhone apps. I also spoke to our paediatrician today.

    I’ve come up with a plan that’s mainly centred around responding to L’s cues, which I’ve been terrible at so far. We have just started the plan today, and he had 3 naps during the course of the day. Definite improvement.

    However the information I’ve passed to Mario has been little at best. He hears bits and pieces here and there, and definitely out of order. Needless to say he gets concerned and confused on what’s going on.

    He tried to voice the concern to me, I boiled over and snapped at him. I told him I feel unsupported in the sense of trying to do the best for L. In all fairness my husband has been amazing and is doing so much for both L and I.

    Essentially I could have handled that situation a thousand times better. There’s a lot of excuses I could offer, but no. I just could have done better.

    Strike 5.

    So I’m sorry

    So friends, family and Mario. Please accept my apologies.

    I’m trying to keep you all happy while simultaneously trying to keep L’s best interests at heart.

    It’s hard. It’s really f**king hard.

    Please know I love you all and I don’t mean any offence. If I make a call you don’t agree with please raise it with me – I appreciate the honesty. I hate finding out days or weeks after that I’ve hurt your feelings (again, not intentional).

    Now I think it’s time for me to go to bed. I clearly need a sleep and a bit of a cry.

    Nice things I love since having a baby

    Nice things I love since giving birth

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    Yesterday  I wrote about gross things I now love since giving birth, which as you can tell by the title, discusses some pretty gross things. In order to not scare anyone off child birth, I wanted to share some of the nice things I love since having a baby. After all, it’s not all bad! Let’s just not talk about the whole “going into labour” thing – otherwise I will scare people off.

    Let’s get into the good stuff.

    Developing a whole new love for my husband

    I was pretty loved up before we had a child, but this just took it to a new level. When my hormones were raging, I cried over how much I loved him. Looking at our wedding photo made me break down. The thing is that it’s not just that my heart melts when I watch him holding our child. It’s more than that.

    We had a hard start to the week when we came home from the hospital, with some pretty crazy sleep deprivation. Since then we’ve also had to navigate our way through many other situations. Each time, we’ve worked through it together.  There hasn’t been a moment yet when I haven’t felt supported by him.  

    To be honest we still get frustrated with each other, and I’m sure I can be super annoying. We both have opposing views on some things (I’m for swaddling, he’s not), yet when that happens we discuss it together and determine a way forward. We have each other’s back.

    Yesterday afternoon I was mentally exhausted. Bub had been feeding for most of the afternoon and didn’t want to be put down to take a nap. I hadn’t been able to move for hours, and felt chained to the couch. The tears came and I felt overwhelmed. I asked my husband if he wouldn’t mind taking the baby just so I could take a few minutes to myself. Without any complaint, Mario took our bub and I got the rest I needed. I was so grateful.

    The mushy stuff about him and our child is just a bonus on top. Watching him interact with our son just melts my heart fifty times over. The joy and love on his face when he looks at our son is just beautiful. I cherish each moment I get to witness it. Mario would do anything for this child, and he’s a completely hands-on father. He changes nappies, baths our bub, helps me as much as possible with feeds, etc etc etc. The list goes on. I’m so glad he’s my husband, my son’s father, and who I get to spend the rest of my life with. He’s an amazing father.

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    Baby cuddles are awesome

    In the past when people would hand me their babies I would hold it out in front of me, dangling, and ask “what do I do now?”

    Thankfully I’ve figured out the answer to that question now that I have my own child, otherwise that could have been awkward. Although I would have had some awesome shoulder muscles – holding that much weight out permanently would certainly become taxing.

    Our bub loves to fall asleep while feeding – he’s a supreme expert of it. Generally we have to wait a bit before moving him, otherwise he will wake right up (unless we want him to wake up so he feeds more of course). When we’re trying to burp him, if we put him up on our shoulder he snuggles in for cuddles. Likewise when he’s laying on our chest. And holy cow, the feels!

    When he snuggles in it kick starts this whole warm fuzzy feeling that is totally foreign to me. Is it cluckiness? General love for a baby? Something else? Whatever it is, it’s awesome – I can feel myself totally just chill out and relax. That is, unless I need to pee, in which case I think “awww, loving the cuddles buddy but I NEED TO FREAKING PEE!”

    If you don’t have a child yet, and someone hands you a baby, don’t dangle the child in front of you. Get that child all in on your neck/chest and cuddle that thing tight. It’s awesome.

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    Appreciating sleep…when we get it

    I wrote in the past about the first few nights being sheer hell with sleep. I’m probably going to massively jinx this by writing about how it’s not been so bad since. Especially since he’s slept a lot today, so we might be in for a rough night.

    Excluding the first few night,s our bub has been quite generous to us with sleep.

    He’s worked out day and night, and now we’re averaging 5 – 7 hours of sleep overnight. It’s broken up with feeds and nappy changes in the middle, but every little bit adds up. Normally he’s asleep anywhere between 8 – 10pm, with the first sleep lasting 3 – 4 hours before he’s ready for a feed. Half an hour or so later he’s fed and goes down again for another 3 hours or so. Some nights he only wakes once, other nights might be two or three times.

    I am so grateful for bub letting us get half decent amounts. I’ve been able to function.

    In saying that, I’ve just jinxed it. Better have a nap before bed tonight so I’m prepared for a shitty night, just in case. I’ve got some expressed breast milk as backup too, so if needed I can take one shift and Mario can take the next. Gotta have a backup plan!

    The response from our loved ones

    Watching my friends and family meet our bub for the first time and seeing the joy on their faces is fantastic. At the moment we’re a bit hardcore on who can hold him. He’s not yet 6 weeks old, which means he hasn’t had his vaccinations. We don’t want him getting sick, so unless the person has recently had vaccinations (the whooping cough in particular) then we’ve asked them to stay away until after the 6 weeks.

    Everyone has mostly supported this, which has been greatly appreciated. I can’t wait to be able to pass bub around for cuddles, particularly while he’s in this small newborn phase. I’ve felt a little bit of an underlying resentment from a couple of people, but I’ve ignored it for the most part. I stand by our decision, and hubby has been very vocal on this point as well. The health of our child comes first.

    So i’m extremely grateful and love that our immediately family got shots so they could come earlier, and that others have held off out of respect for our wishes.

    I love you guys!

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    Doing housework

    This sounds wanky, but whenever I get a chance to do housework it’s like I’m hitting a reset button my level of sanity.

    Doing housework feels normal to me, and it’s something I enjoy. Vacuuming the floors, unpacking the dishwasher, putting clothes on to wash….it feels like a normal life again. Pre-birth I had a morning routine: wake, put on washing, breakfast, unpack dishwasher, clean kitchen, hang out clothes, vacuum, shower, get ready for work, leave. Pre-pregnancy that also included a 30-60min workout (we got up quite early).

    Right now that routine is just not possible. I’m feeding bub whenever he needs it, and sleeping in as late as he lets us. With the recovery from a c section I’ve had to take it easy, which includes not doing housework. Mario has been doing it all while I rest on the couch and feed baby.

    However in the last few days I’ve started to feel better, and I’ve been able to get bub down for daytime naps. As we have been getting decent sleep overnight I’ve been able to pick at little bits of housework here and there, and it means I’m contributing!

    I’m not someone who does well with a lack of independence and physical activity, so for every little bit I can get it feels so good.

    Honourable mentions:

    • Dressing baby in cool little fun outfits and getting epic pictures as a result

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  • Giving baby a bath/shower and watching him soak in the water with a serene look on his face
  • Making it through another day having not totally f**ked up yet
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    Heyyyy…I’m 29 and had an awesome weekend

    So today begins the last year of my 20's, as I have now hit the ripe old age of 29. Just in time to get my life sorted for the 30's; there's no better time than now!

    Courtesy of my amazing friends and family, I had an absolute cracker of a weekend. It began Friday night when a friend and I headed down to the local stadium to watch the QLD Reds take on the chiefs, which they unfortunately lost. However it did mean that I met my new favourite player, only for the extremely shallow reason that he is gorgeous. Other than that I don't really follow Rugby Union. [...]  read more